Thursday, May 9, 2013
Bipolar and Me
Hi folks,
I thought I'd let you in on why I'm so iffy about updating my blog. I have a very severe form of bipolar disorder. Before you tell me to pray it away, I'd like to explain a little about the disorder and its causes and treatments. I've had bipolar disorder since I was at least 7 but probably a little younger. I have manic episodes, where I'm prone to hyperreligiousity, bad decisions, and arguing with Christians (lol I do that all the time anyway). I also have depressive episodes, where I'm prone to not doing anything but sulk and try to commit suicide. I've been in a depressive cycle since October 2011, which is why I haven't really been working on the blog too much.
Bipolar disorder is a neurological disorder, like depression or schizophrenia. It's related to schizophrenia, and bipolar people can become delusional while manic or depressed. It's a disease; some people have it, some people don't. It's not the punishment of God or something; it's like cancer or diabetes, it's just a disease. I happen to have it. I'm not embarrassed that I have a disease; it's just something I struggle through. I take a variety of medications for my bipolar disorder; right now I'm on Klonopin, Abilify, and Wellbutrin (yeah, all three at the same time, every day; I take ten pills a day). I wish that I was healthy or at least manic, but I have my good times and my bad times. It's like cancer that way; it comes and it goes. I hope that I'll be manic soon so I can feel motivated to work on the blog. You guys are fantastic and I love all of you, and I wish I could do more work on the blog for you all.
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Do you have a blog post that tells your conversion story?
ReplyDeleteThats the very next blog post I'll write.
DeleteAssalamo 'alaykom wr wb,
ReplyDeleteAww don't worry about the blog hun. I don't know you personally, but I hugely appreciate the work you put into your writing, and even more so knowing what a struggle it can be at times. May Allah facilitate it for you and make it an expiation of sins. <3
Thanks for the support! :)
DeleteWell, hope you cope up. There is no illness Allah cannot cure. There is atleast one case where an AID's patient recovered fully on his own. A disease does not necessarily have to be a result of a sin. Remember prophet Ayub Koran 17:83-85: he prayed to Allah and Allah cured him of his dreadful disease(es). Ayub did not become gravely sick because he sinned, but because Allah wanted to test him. So, while you take your medicines, pray to Allah He makes them a means of a healthy recovery.
ReplyDeleteThats the indomitable spirit which great people have they are not afraid of their failures or diseases but rise up and take advantage of what people think as diseases, failures , risk etc...
ReplyDeleteYou are already taking advantage of the Maniac episodes, apart from that, fasting for Allah's sake can help you take control of excessive energy and help you loose weight ,
For the depressive episodes you should read more of the Quran and try not being alone at all , make new female friends , join a local Islamic dawah group for ladies etc, if they dont exist work to create one.
try niacin ( non flush from solgar) ...1000mg 3 times a day with omega from solgar ....1500 mg vitamin c with it three times a day, exercise daily....only eat natural and this will help u reduce your medicine.
ReplyDeleteSalam 3liekom sister.
ReplyDeleteIt is very brave of you to accept having this disorder. My sister was diagnosed with this condition too. I understand how hard it might get as I used to see my sister in her manic episodes and it was very very hard to live through. She takes seroquel and she's doing better. May Allah heal and reward you both and everyone who suffers from this condition. Ameen
Allah bless you!!!
ReplyDelete